{"product_id":"youre-all-just-bastards-t-shirt","title":"You're All Just Bastards T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eSome people enter your life and make it better. Others show up like an unsolicited family reunion, bringing nothing but attitude, questionable judgment, and the overwhelming desire to reconsider your social circle. The “You’re All Just Bastards” T-shirt is for those moments when humanity has collectively exhausted your patience, and pretending otherwise feels like an unnecessary expense. It's not about singling anyone out or playing favorites. Quite the opposite. This shirt delivers a beautifully indiscriminate insult to everyone who has ever tested your tolerance, wasted your time, or demonstrated an impressive commitment to being insufferable. Whether you're dealing with coworkers who mistake incompetence for confidence, strangers who treat common courtesy like an optional subscription, or people who seem determined to make their problems your responsibility, this statement cuts straight through the nonsense. No lengthy explanations, no diplomatic disclaimers, and absolutely no exceptions. Just a gloriously offensive observation delivered with the kind of conviction that suggests you've had enough of everyone's bullshit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMade from durable medium-weight cotton, this shirt features a comfortable classic unisex fit designed for everyday wear. The ribbed crew neck, reinforced shoulder taping, and tear-away label provide lasting comfort and durability. Its aggressive, heavy-metal-inspired typography features jagged, distressed lettering in a weathered bone-white finish, surrounded by a circular barbed-wire design. Against the solid black background, the graphic creates a rebellious, unapologetic statement that looks like it belongs on the merchandise table of a band with absolutely no interest in making friends.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhy This Shirt Makes a Statement\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBecause sometimes the problem isn't one particular person. It's the entire guest list.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBecause diplomacy is exhausting, and you've officially retired from pretending everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd because when everybody insists on acting like a bastard, it's only fair to acknowledge their collective achievement.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults, Made in Nicaragua\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Mayhem Haus","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67655836401956,"sku":"19187293346791384220","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67655836467492,"sku":"95876720521580381708","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67655836533028,"sku":"17840064839554987381","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67655836598564,"sku":"11102718675351901359","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67655836664100,"sku":"28211417529657515911","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":67655836729636,"sku":"13552265877512190690","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":67655836795172,"sku":"25650647613095907284","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":67655836860708,"sku":"12605342047718625321","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":67655836369188,"sku":"21790322685593333992","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":67655836434724,"sku":"27080447553150329462","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":67655836500260,"sku":"36555578054220718790","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":67655836565796,"sku":"30128387353718459510","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":67655836631332,"sku":"27208170305280389490","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":67655836696868,"sku":"64184310608741121778","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":67655836762404,"sku":"74056278945485131472","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":67655836827940,"sku":"31091368215620532956","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0909\/6655\/6964\/files\/16172443700470028717_2048.jpg?v=1791548231","url":"https:\/\/mayhemhaus.com\/products\/youre-all-just-bastards-t-shirt","provider":"Mayhem Haus","version":"1.0","type":"link"}